


my heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue

by GoldenBadWolf



Series: you can sing to it, dance to it, fall in love with it. [5]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Character Study, Dancing, Domestic Fluff, Dorks in Love, Established Relationship, F/F, F/M, Immortal Rose Tyler, Immortality, Jazz - Freeform, Multi, One Shot, Reminiscing, Romantic Fluff, Slow Dancing, Song Lyrics, Song: Lover (Taylor Swift), Soulmates, They're stupid and in love okay, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-24
Updated: 2019-09-24
Packaged: 2020-10-27 10:51:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20759168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoldenBadWolf/pseuds/GoldenBadWolf
Summary: They were dancing. Laughing and joking and bickering and they moved about the console room. She’d found him scribbling on the chalkboard. So zoned in on whatever he had been trying to sort out. Shoulders tense, eyebrows furrowed, and white dust coated his coat. So she convinced him to dance. It didn’t come without complaint, but it did come eventually. They had been doing actual dances. But the effort soon waned off, especially when they weren’t doing more than swaying and moving towards and away from each other. Echos of giggles and tiny smiles as they began to fall into their own minds. Especially when she caught his gaze.





	my heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue

**Author's Note:**

  * For [doctorwhos](https://archiveofourown.org/users/doctorwhos/gifts).

> For my pal Atlas bc he really inspired this if I'm being honest.

_Can I go where you go?_  
_ Can we always be this close forever and ever?_  
_ And ah, take me out, and take me home (Forever and ever)_  
_ You're my, my, my, my lover_

* * *

They were dancing. Laughing and joking and bickering and they moved about the console room. She’d found him scribbling on the chalkboard. So zoned in on whatever he had been trying to sort out. Shoulders tense, eyebrows furrowed, and white dust coated his coat. So she convinced him to dance. It didn’t come without complaint, but it did come eventually. They had been doing actual dances. But the effort soon waned off, especially when they weren’t doing more than swaying and moving towards and away from each other. Echos of giggles and tiny smiles as they began to fall into their own minds. Especially when she caught his gaze.

**\---**

She knew he always looked so much softer when they were alone. Or when he was with her rather than being alone. Throughout every regeneration she’s been through with him, that statement has rung true.

She found herself running her thumb over the crease in his eyebrows. He smiled and let go of the rest of the tension he had been holding.

He last face was the youngest it had ever been. With quaffed hair, a love for bow ties, and a lack of eyebrows. Yet out of the time she had known him, it was the time he’d act as if he were his age. When they were in public and talked with people, they would call him an old soul. And every time it happened, she couldn’t help but think of how true it was.

But this face was pulling at her heartstrings. The silver curls and supposed “attack” eyebrows and stupid grins. Eyes no longer those deep brown hues but some strange mix of blue and green. This face was ringing out with childish expressions despite the age lines. Moving and running about with no purpose, always looking for something to get into trouble with if the Tardis hadn’t taken them somewhere. Even when he was moving with purpose, it was giddy and full of excitement the majority of the time. Often, he’d get major side-eyes from others in public. Not that either of them noticed.

With the face came a new console room. The last had been dark and mechanical, like everything was set in stone. There was no longer any coral in it. She didn’t realize how, despite the grunge and rough, the coral brought so much warmth into the room. So much more personality. She never told him that. More likely because when the console room was a reflection of him.

But this console room was warm. Despite the mechanical elements and the lack of coral still remaining. It was comfy with the books and the chalkboard. The way he’d walk around the banister while rambling. Trying to make a point to his own mind. Or the guitar and amp that sat hidden under the stairs. How he’d play when he was bored or just too deep in his mind. Playing melodies that were based on the people he loved. Even though he thought he could never tell them. Or when he was playing well known riffs and leads that he claimed to help create. Talking of artists like they were a best friend at one point. He made it so much more like a place that could feel like home. He brought the personality of it back.

He’d become so much lighter and younger despite the age that this face had become. No longer so strict with his ways, loose and so alright with things to go awry. He was dazzling. Sometimes an idiot. But beautiful either way.

Rose wondered how long it had really been. Because much like the face she met him in, time slowed when he smiled. Saying something completely unadulterated. Waiting to get a reaction before jumping in to make sense. Wearing dark clothes and being gruff. But with good in heart. And this time, with much more meaning.

**\---**

“What are you thinking about?” The Scottish brought her back to reality.

They weren’t really dancing anymore. Swaying in place as they both were caught up in their own minds. Knowing that it wasn’t anything terrible. Just lost in the ambiance and atmosphere as Elle Fitzgerald echoed throughout the console room.

“Us.” She said with a small smile.

He tripped somehow. This body wasn’t the most coordinated, she’d noticed. Nor did it look as graceful when running.

He scoffed and smiled, “Well what about us?”

She hummed and leaned into him. Putting her head in his chest and listening to the double heartbeat. Feeling him sigh as his hand found the back of her head and tangled in her hair. His kiss to the top of her head.

They stayed like that for a moment. Still shifting slightly. Caught up in each other more than anything.

“Remembered what I promised you all that time ago?” The way he had his arms wrapped around her muffled her words slightly.

She looked up at him, chin pressing into his chest still as he adjusted his grasp on her. The way his arms moved made her wrap her arms around him in return.

He grinned, “How could I forget?”

**\---**

He had a home. And the two things that made it were both grown and beautiful. The Tardis hadn’t been his sole constant for nearly two millennia now. No longer just the distinct blue that marked him and his presence. But also that pink and yellow.

Rose had grown before she stayed. But it was in maturity. She was simply growing in essence now. As she watched him live and yearn and fail. Watched him become the worst man he could ever be just as much as she watched him become the best. But that word was wrong. Because she didn’t just watch. She walked with him. Changed with him. Experienced all the heartbreak and euphoria with him. And never thought about leaving him behind.

She grew in everything. Her personality, beliefs, mindset- they all grew as she learned what forever with him meant. It was one of the most beautiful things he had ever been blessed to see.

He knew this when She lost her mom but watched Tony grow. Watched her nieces and nephews. Told them the all her stories. Watched the Tyler name become something magnificent and swell before being lost to time. That’s what she said, at least. Even though she’s at every point and place through time.

They kept in touch with old friends as much as family. Donna traveled with and without them but always called often. Sometimes be picked up when she got stuck. Others times because she just needed someone who understood her. Sarah Jane was always happy to see them. Even if she did want to knock him in the back of the head when he regenerated again. The Doctor would take Wilf out for lunch and to observatories during astronomical moments in history. While Rose caught up with Jack, Mickey, and Martha. He’d tag along later. They went to baby shower’s, graduations, and ceremonies. They made sure to come by on Easter and Christmas, normally staying through Boxing Day and New Years.

They still brought in strays. Because they knew they needed that humanity- even if her own humanity was still shining. They reminded him of all the things he’d become blind to and her of all the things she’d forget to miss if they weren’t on their ship. But also because she wanted them to experience what she still hadn’t gotten over. New soil and air. New beings and creatures. Completely different cultures. He watched her face and never got over the expression she made at their reactions. Something indescribable.

Everyone they had traveled with left a mark on them both. Clear with Amy in the Scottish. Clear with Rory in the way she had relearned patience. Clear with Clara in the way he realized that every question didn’t need an understandable answer. And in the way that Rose realized what it meant to be so like the Doctor. Clear in River in the way that they both realized that they didn’t have to fall in love with just one.

Though he was still wary of the pretty boys and girls they ran into. Not in the fact that she’d leave for them. But just because it was ingrained in his nature. Something that would never change, he guessed.

More than the jealousy it could’ve been though, it was knowing that he had the woman that most would dream of. Someone who beamed and laughed at him even if he wouldn’t understand why. Someone who could be there when he fell. Someone unbelievably okay with the terrible things he’s done and will do. Someone who loved with her entire heart so much so that it seeped out in moments like this.

The only person he knew he could spend the rest of his lives with.

**\---**

So, he laughed at her smile. And they were dancing with purpose again when Moonlight Serenade began to play. Picking up the dance from the beginning of forever. Twirling her with a little less grace and catching her when she stumbled. Both laughing into their kiss as he dipped her.

Jack in the back of both of their minds as they were completely childish and full of glee. Bouncing as they thought of all their glorious things. Only slowing back down when the song ended. Swaying once again, but this time with blushes flush across their cheeks.

“I remember when I asked you how long you were going to stay with me.” He said, “And you said forever.”

They stood still for the first time since they started dancing. It wasn’t heavy; whatever had begun to hang over the two of them. But whatever he was about to say was going to be true.

“Yeah?” She kept him going. He never liked being vulnerable. But this time he was almost insecure about showing bits and pieces of his heart and soul.

“Then a few days later I lost you and decided that I lost everything I could have ever believed in.”

“Doc-”

“Shut up.”

They both laughed and Rose urged him to move again as Billie Holiday began to sing: “Someday when I'm awfully low/When the world is cold/I will feel a glow/Just thinking of you/And the way you look tonight”

But in the moment, his words were much more important. So much more resonate and soulful.

He looked up and grinned before looking back to her, “And I realized- I realized that I couldn’t be on my own. That you’d despise that idea. Me alone, because of you.” He raised his eyebrows and his eyes darted to the side, “And it took me a moment to realize it.”

She shook her head with a smile as he continued. His hands trying to express despite her holding them.

“I met my best friend. I watched Martha become someone who knew what they were doing. I watched you come back as someone who knew what they wanted. And I realized what you meant to me was what meant to others. Maybe not with the complete faith.” He tilted his head and raised his shoulder as if he was pointing out a pile all the things he could possibly mean, “But I knew that, as Sarah Jane said, I had the biggest family in the world. Even if I didn’t realize in the moment- if I felt I was completely alone in the moment she said it- I’d know what she mean eventually. And know that it meant I wouldn’t be alone again. Not completely.”

She went to say something but he cut her off once again.

“What I’m trying to say is, I believe in you. Everything I could ever fall back on and go to when I’m lost is you. And if I have to tell that to some deity, I would in a heartbeat.”

He had done it once. Shouted to the damn body of the devil. And was willing to do it again if he needed to. He belief system is one person. One human turned literal goddess. Then equivalent to a demigod who was so much more human than deity.

It was her. She was all he knew he could completely believe in. Even when he didn’t know her face. Or himself. Lost his sight. Lost track of time. Lost track of his own mind. He knew there was someone else out there that knew the truth as well as him. And he’d do anything she asked for her. Anything to keep her with him. Anything that made sure she was somewhere in the same universe as him. As long as she was here, he’d find his way to her. Even if it meant traveling through heaven and hell. He’d find a way to hold her hand again. Just as much as she would for him. As much as she did.

And he was willing to tell everyone. It could be awkward and arrogant or he could seem like a complete lovesick fool. But he was willing to do it. Not just for her, but himself.

This time around, with this face, he didn’t need the words. Something brought him back to the meaning of music. Allowed it back to his fingertips. As the chords and solos he played seemed to ring out in ways that could touch people’s souls in the way he wanted to when he talked about his belief in the woman who owned his hearts.

She knew that’s what the distorted noise meant just as much as him. Especially when he joined the woman who gave him that damn trench coat on stage. At Woodstock. She was to the side of the stage and knew the melody despite it being muffled. He could feel her eyes on him. But he watched the audience, ankle-deep in mud, feel and understand what he needed them to.

She watched his eyes as they scanned her face nervously. And all she knew to do was to pull him into a hug.He didn’t complain about it. Because they both knew neither of them were hiding. And that it was only impulse for her.

He continued to sway with her arms around his neck. Humming to song. Stopping to mumble something into her ear or press a kiss to her jaw or neck. She pulled back and absentmindedly ran her finger over where the creases would be.

“Looking for something?” He asked.

The only thing she could say was, “I love you.”

**\---**

It took so much time for him to understand that. And he was still processing it. The idea that he was everything to her just as much as she was everything to him. Centuries to come around to the idea and decades of questions and answer. She knew everything that she meant and all that it was worth. She needed him to know too. Even if it took another two millennium. In his stupidest moments, she was pulled to him. When he was angry and acting as if he were the deity, she couldn’t bare to leave him alone. No matter how much he’d drive her to tears or anger or away. Even when they couldn’t be more polarized, she knew she needed to be his hand to hold.

**\---**

He kissed her before he responded. Grinning against her lips before pulling back to say, “And I love you.”

**\---**

Because it would always be alright. Even if it was only his version of alright. As long as they were together. Making sure they remained the stuff of legends. Falling into the best and worst moments in time and space. Being the center-point of beauty and tragedy.

As long as one of the hands he held was hers.

They aged and grew wary with each other. They always would. She made a promise that would always hold true. And it would be the one thing she would be sure to keep. As much as they grew older and older, they made sure at some point, they were light. Making sure to keep up with inside jokes and emotions that she figured would never change. Being overdramatic at the best and worst moments. Always remaining pure of heart. Even in the depths of dirty jokes and arguments. She knew what it meant to wait. To save a seat for someone who rarely sat down. To know when they needed to sit down.

**\---**

He pulled her back and into a kiss. It was soft and aimless. Much like the majority of his thoughts right now. But it was the only way to keep her from saying useless words. Almost two thousand years, and she never let go of the rambling of things he’d already known from the start.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed it bc they truly make me emotionally feral.
> 
> Song: Lover by Taylor Swift
> 
> I'm on Tumblr: GoldenBadWolf


End file.
